Tuesday, April 13, 2010

The "Truth" According To The Irish Rover

Now that Lefty's is at war with the Irish Rover, I find it appropriate to stick it to them in any way possible, regardless of how unrelated it may be to the central conflict in this fight. I am also deeply amused by the imbalance in this war because the Rover is a biweekly paper, making their potential response time akin to an enemy in a painfully boring turn-based RPG.

Although I assume the section with the Rover titled "Cheers & Jeers" isn't supposed to be taken seriously, I find a certain entry in this section unprintably offensive. I don't even need to comment on this piece to convey my point, so I'll just Media Matters it for ya and give you the text straight up. We now know what the Rover means when they say "truth" or as Chris pointed out earlier, 'thought editing.'

On Truth
Brandon Payne

I want to briefly reflect on something that I care deeply about: truth. Not "truth" in some grand philosophical sense as my Rover colleagues think of it. I mean truth as in just calling things like you see them. For example, why does the Observer use made up names in its April Fool's "Absurder" issue? Just use real names. We all know who they are talking about anyway. It's like their [sic] afraid of getting sued- then they might not be able to embezzle University funds for their house parties anymore? I don't get it. Just be honest. Like, say, Observer Editor-in-Chief Matt Gamber is a politically correct pussy-whipped dimwit who can't handle opposing viewpoints [referring to the following incident]. Or, say, Fr. Jenkins is a weaselly, spineless pushover with the hand shake of a dead fish. John Affleck-Graves' career is a minefield of conflicts of interest and backroom deals shadier than Toyota safety tests. The Panzer Pope covers up sex scandals. We all know those things are true, so why beat around the bush? Oh, and Polacks suck. The only thing Polacks have ever contributed to civilization are John Paul II and Esperanto. They can't even avoid crashing their presidential plane.

14 comments:

Bill said...

eww

I hope this came out on April 1st?

ShamRockNRoll said...

Jesus Christ. Does the Rover really attempt to be this trashy? I mean hell, I drop the occasional f-bomb and call some deserving people a douchebag once in a while (usually people who write for the Rover)... but really? Saying this kind of stuff about Fr. Hesburgh of all people, and oh, let's throw in a dash of racism at the end too. What complete failures of human beings.

J D said...

Stay classy, Rover.

(Though, um, he's kind of right about the Pope -- which shocked me -- and JAG.)

ShamRockNRoll said...

True. I was surprised a Roverite would dare cross his holiness, lol.

Anonymous said...

Why are you all so upset when Brandon was clearly aiming for entertainment alone?

ShamRockNRoll said...

I don't think that was very clear. Why do conservatives so often resort to things like racial slurs to find humor? It's really not funny to anyone but themselves. Frankly, I took some of this as maybe an attempt at humor... yet it follows so closely to the standard fare The Rover publishes that it was really hard to tell.

Anonymous said...

Hyper-sensitive liberals. Ugh!

ShamRockNRoll said...

I also just find it funny that "The Absurder's" ad for Rover staff that required that they simply read and write (Featured at the bottom of Chris' post re: Fr. Ted) clearly isn't getting them any writers or copy editors who know the difference between there, their, or they're. lol

Aly said...

There are very few things that are funny about that post, especially when it is published material available for the public to read, including those it insults. I fail to find the entertainment in calling Matt Gamber a "politically correct pussy-whipped dimwit who can't handle opposing viewpoints" or implying that a university organization embezzles funds for house parties, which no doubt is a completely unfounded accusation. Entertainment?? This is about as entertaining as the Friends spin off "Joey".

Aly said...

Oh and seriously, making jokes about a plane crash that killed 96 people not even a week after it happened?? Absolutely disgusting.

Anonymous said...

WHAT THE HELL? I can't believe this was printed.

Tim Ryan said...

I can believe this was in the Rover, I can't believe that the University still allows this crap to be distributed in dining halls and other buildings when they just continue to get more offensive with every issue. The school should not legitimize these scumbags.

Thomas Wachtel said...

I know me some communications law, and there's some stuff in here that's borderline libel. There are definitely courts that wouldn't recognize this as satire.

Colleen Lowry said...

Although you all make valid points, I'm still trying to get over the bad grammar he used. Can't they AT LEAST find an editor for this sham of a paper?